rose-erkul-36990This is not like my usual posts, but I’d like to share a personal experience today.

It’s a slow grind to the top to of Mt Everest, and sometimes climbers need to backtrack down the mountain to acclimate to higher altitudes. Anticipate altitude sickness, because climbers that do are better equipped to handle the challenges that lie on the journey ahead. Climbing Mt. Everest was never meant to be easy, it’s a test of fortitude, will, and perseverance. Mt. Everest isn’t just a mountain in Nepal, it’s our greatest challenge—it’s our purpose. What’s your Mt. Everest?

I moved out of my mom’s house and rented a room from a 36-year-old Filipino lady living in an apartment nearby my work. I hope to live here for only a few months until I can get my own space in better living conditions with people closer to my age. I just needed to get out of my situation and onto my own thing. As much as I love my family and as much money as I was saving, I just wasn’t in a healthy situation. I felt that moving out was the best decision for my mental and physical health.The universe is giving me a sign to move on with my life. It’s been long overdue. I needed to get out of my parent’s house and on my own. I needed to start thinking about making business moves even with the student loans I owe. I need to make more revenue, and that wasn’t going to happen where I was staying.

My dad called me the day I moved out. He said, “you’re really independent now.” It felt liberating. My throat swelled up. My eyes glazed with tears. I puckered my lips. To think, I’m really standing on my own now. I’m not in the most ideal living situation, but I’m in a situation on my own. I put myself here. I’m not in a bad situation, my landlady is sweet. And I’m also learning how to keep my living space clean. This is also a challenge in being a minimalist.

Moving Out in One Week

Since I had to move out quickly, the first thing I did was rent a local storage unit so I could just leave all my stuff in the unit while I look for a room. Once I found the room, I brought a laundry basket full of clothes, furnished the already furnished room with a bookcase (more like a stuff-I-frequently-use case), and just left the rest of my stuff in the storage unit. I plan to transfer my stuff to my dad’s house when I get the chance, but, for now, having this storage unit helps me to maintain a minimalist mindset. I have only taken the few books I’ll be reading over these couple of months so as not to have too much stuff in my room. I only brought the stuff I’ll be using every day—clothes, the books I plan to read, my laptop, a DSLR camera and my most used electronics.

I moved out because I just want to focus on my own stuff right now. This is actually a blessing. Now that I have this opportunity to be distraction free, I should use this time to build the better habits that will get me into a successful situation. I should use this time towards building the habits it takes to become a successful writer.

Since I’ve moved out, I’ve already started implementing better habits. I read the Power of Habit last year, and I remember it going over the concept of building habits in new places that a person lives. I’ve already begun putting the right practices in place, like reading, writing, and practicing yoga.

What am I reading?

Before I moved out, I bought a book called I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn’t) by Brené Brown. After listening to her other book on audible, Daring Greatly, I was intrigued by her presentation style and thought I could use more of the information she’s willing to teach—and I have. From reading Daring Greatly, I enjoyed her idea of getting into vulnerable situations to improve resistance to stress. The more practice with vulnerability, the better one can be with dealing with these situations—I liked it.

In her book I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn’t), she explores the concept of shame and how it affects people. Brené Brown researched shame throughout her career. For 10 years, she went to school, conducted studies and read books about shame, continuing to grow her understanding of how shame is used and how it affects people.

Shame is paralyzing. It stops a person from acting. It distracts them from their true goals. So what does this have to do with me moving out?

I needed to get out of my parent’s house because I felt shameful living there. While I love my mom for everything she’s done for me, raising me, taking care of me, recently she’s treated me poorly—I’m just being honest about my feelings, don’t hate me, fam. I grew up thinking I was “the bad kid” and my brothers were successful children. Now that I’m older, I can see how that influenced me; and now I can make efforts towards getting away from that. I don’t regret the experiences I’ve had, but I can’t continue to feel stifled in my environment when I’m trying to blossom.

A flower may be better protected from the storm for having been raised in a garden, but it fails to receive the tenacity and fortitude that one would have earned if it blossomed despite having been battered by bad weather.

Now that I’ve moved out, there’s no one else to blame for my mishaps but me. This is all on me now. My life is dependent on my own ability to follow through with my own goals.

Getting Back on the Bandwagon

I fell off lately with my blog because of everything that was happening with my life, but that’s ok because we experience bumps in the road. I’m working as best I can with what I have, and that’s all you can really ask for.

I’ve set a budget for my money and I’ve written down my goals. It’s all dependent on my ability to go through with my plans and fulfilling my goals. I need to struggle right now so I know what it means to have a good life. I’ve had it too easy, and the universe is telling me that I need to become more independent with my life and move out on my own.

Where I Am Now

My room came furnished with a twin-sized bed, a desk, a lamp, and a computer chair. One of the sliding mirrors to the closet doesn’t work, so I just leaned it against the wall—I like it this way, it serves as my mirror when I’m stretching, which is good for my fitness goals. I stored my clothes and bags in my closet, put a few books, my electronics and my workout equipment—a stretch band, a rhino ball and a foam roller—onto my bookcase and called it a day. I put my shampoo, conditioner, lotion, face wash, and micellar water into one basket, so I’m back in college again sharing a bathroom with other tenants.

It’s really not a bad life, but it does suck that I’m going to have to pay rent and my student loans at the same time. I just wish I could have paid down my student loans a little more before I left, but I guess that’s my fault for not prioritizing student loans and buying lavishly—in the year that I’ve had my job, I’ve saved less than $3,000 and paid less than $3,000 on my student loans. Where did all my money go? Eating out. Living lavishly—buying Emporio Armani sunglasses in Rome. I should have saved more of my money, but it is what it is. I am where I am now, and I have to deal with it.

My first goal after settling in is to develop another revenue stream and start freelancing. Next, I plan to get into a living situation where I’m free to start my business. With multiple revenue streams, my living situation will get better—I’ll be able to live comfortably as a vegan in my own home, writing and juicing every day and just living happy.